Princess Di and Michael Jackson still dead. Film footage at eleven!
As for here at Sportsmen’s Camp its still raining daily but at least there are enough breaks to get some work done and some fishing in and the docks are not awash.
Everything takes more time here at camp and many unlikely chains of events occur. For instance Jim Baxter wanted to get to his fishing spots quicker so we purchased a larger motor for him. After putting it on the fiberglass boat and extensive testing. I noticed the boat leaking and had to pull it out and fix it. After emailing Jim about the new motor he put the “mal oche” on me inveighing the Evil Janeeto from the planet Janetron to nag me to trap a bunch of leeches. This also prompted the “Evil One” to note “You know your stupid sister is gonna want leeches TOO!” Sooooo hen pecked as always I get the leech traps out. But Gee, we have 5 leech traps but no fresh fish cark-eye (plural of carcass). So we’re gonna have to go fishing, but we’re nearly outta beer! So off to Quick’s we go to buy more beer. Then we pack the provisions to go fishing with extra ice to cool the beer properly. There just so happens to be five people here to feed and five leech traps so we have to catch five eating sized fish. We caught the required fish quickly but there were 7 beers in the cooler so we had to stay out fishing longer. After returning I filleted the fish and fried them in beer batter and remembered – those fish carkeye are down in the fish house! So I retrieved the carkeye put them in the traps and drove to the leech pond and set the traps. All the beer and food and activity made me sleepy so I went to bed early! 12:30! So now I am up early (got up at 9 AM!) and feel like shit and I have to get the garbage. When I take the garbage I’ll have to go to the Beauty Lake dump so I can pick up the leeches on the way back. So that BASTARD JIM BAXTER is making me go to the Beauty Lake dump in a few minutes! And to top it off he made me get up early so I have time to write this stupid fucking blog while I drink my tea and now all of you idiots are reading this shit — all because of that BASTARD JIM BAXTER!
The fishing yesterday was excellent – Janet (Evil One) caught two nice eating sized walleye and I caught several bass and a pike. Three of the bass I caught were 18 / 19 inch class I caught the majority of my fish on mepps and I think Janet caught most of her’s on mepps. Several were caught on leeches as well and we didn’t have any luck locating the perch here on Firth. The water temperature is at 68F and the water level is back down to 0.90′ on the lake gauge.
Jack that is sounding great, 4 weeks to go and the evil JIm Baxter is getting you prepared for an extensive week of fishing and drinking. Walleye is shining up his walleye pin so that he can catch us good meals while the rest of us are catching good buzzes! Can’t wait to get there, and hopefully you are picking us out some good fishing spots for this year. Practice up on your “C” words because that just seems to be so damn funny all the time! (Sorry Janet) As long as there is no p-monia between now and then we will be ready for whatever portages you so deam!
Joan can have leeches only after my leech needs are fully met.
Jim Baxter*
But will take her on a spin around the lake with my new motor. After I fly past Phish Phry and swamp his boat.
*(editors note) That Bastard!
This just in: there were copious amounts of luscious leeches in the traps – lots of nice red bellied ones!
How did I get pulled into the bastard pool. I may be a son of a bitch…but totaly legit.
All I know is we will be in the big town on Gowganda before the next moon rises and I am looking forward to beating that bastard Jim Baxter at cornhole. Not to, but at.
For the record I, renowned “evil one”, never called Joan stupid! Crazy, Pain in the Ass maybe but not stupid.
Just kidding, Joan, I was really just seeing to your fishing needs as well as Jim’s even if you didn’t tell me to nag the shit out of Jack, which, if I do say so myself, I am doing a bang-up job.
Janet, I am officially entering a bet on the drinking contest that you will be engaging with The Lovemaster. Unfortunately, it will be against you. How about a $20 gift card at any liquor store. I am sure you will glady accept this bet. I can personally tell you that The Lovemaster has been practicing faithfully every day for this contest. I have seen him drinking incredible quantities and, unlike you, I haven’t seen him spew yet. This is only a bet, nothing personal,R U mad at me?
No I am not mad at you, MyCoochi, but I do feel sorry for anyone that does not believe in the powers of the great and powerful “Queen of the North”.
Janet, you have to remember I was under DWIB. I assume you know what that means.
All hail the “QUEEN of The North” I will be blowing in on Saturday or Sunday to help out with your training for the contest. Let me know if you need anything from down this way. Can’t wait to see everyone. Jack I will also be available to give you a hand with any of the multitude of projects that you have going on at this time, hope we can find some time to drink a little wine LOL. See Ya soon.
Yes, MyCoochi, it is a very powerful, evil influence.
Oh beloved Bear Hunter get her into a rigorous training routine so there will be no excuses,(except possibly mine) Two things there buddy, will you be leaving any of your four wheeled vehicles there for use later? Say about four weeks from now? Also, keep in mind that Walleye and I will be coming past your neighborhood on our way up and back from there, if you would like to hitch a ride!
“Hi, this is Jan’s Liver. I can’t come to the phone right now, but if you’ll leave your name, number and a brief message, I’ll get back to you as soon as I am done kicking Brian’s ass.” . . . . . BEEEEEEEEEP
Is anyone home????? I need an update on the going-on at the Sportsman’s Camp. Since I couldn’t be there, I need to at least have some idea of how much fun and frivolity I am missing.
Desperate for news in Cincinnati, Sharon
They are having too much fun to blog. I think if you go back through the years you will see these are the quietest two weeks for updates, and then the floodgates open with what happened during the news blackout. I can give you some highlights without details. Tibet has come to camp, there are Mojitos involved and everyone hopes Quicks in town has enough beer in stock.
I kind of figured that was the case. I will just continue to sit here in my dark and dusty office and wish I was there. Sharon